Post-College Expectations Vs. Reality

Where have I been for the past few weeks?  Drilling Spanish children on what it means to be healthy or unhealthy? Yes. Over indulging in Spanish culture?  Maybe.  Ignoring blog world? Never.

The truth is that my computer suddenly decided it didn't love me anymore and now processes at a speed roughly slower than a snail/tortoise hybrid baby would.  While it "claims" there is no virus, I'm currently only able to add anything to my blog when the BF isn't using his computer (and with his Master's presentation this week, that time has been few and far between).

With that being said, it's also been a while since I've had a post more about dealing with life after college, instead of my current life abroad in Spain.  While this does happen to be my life after college, I understand that there are many who may come to this blog who aren't very interested in what I'm doing but are looking for advice in the process of leaving their college years behind.

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Well this one's for you guys.

Last year before I came to Spain I wrote a post called: Common Life After College Myths Debunked talking about some common myths I had heard, and some I felt, before graduating.  Now almost two years post-graduation (Seriously? One year after college was hard enough to process...) I'm realizing that all my own expectations and plans have changed, and not necessarily in a negative way.

I thought I would have a real job by now...

Yeah I know it wasn't a good market, and very few people were being hired...but I thought somehow I would be different.  Those statistics didn't apply to me, I had done well in all my student teaching practicums and even won awards, it may take a few tries I would be hired.  Wrong.  I still remember the first teaching jobs I applied to where over 400 people applied to the same position and I wasn't even called in for an interview.  I was heartbroken, like I wasn't a good enough teacher because I wasn't hired straight out of college.  

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But after I started substitute teaching  I began to realize that those statistics were there for a reason, and that I wasn't the only one trying to break into the education field.  There were so many subsitutes I met who had been struggling like this for nearly a decade!  And I finally realized that not having my dream job right away didn't mean I wasn't good enough, I had to define my own worth because no job would do that for me.  So I made up my mind that, that was the year I made the move to Spain.  I wanted to do something different with my life, and while it's still not my dream job being an auxiliar, I feel much more fulfilled working long term with a group of students then subbing in their classroom a few times a year.

I didn't think I could stay healthy

For anyone that has ever known me I'm a food-iac.  I love food, love eating, and worse have a killer sweet tooth.  On the other hand though, I also love to workout and stay physically active, but have the vice that I easily get overwhelmed by pressure and nap when I should be sweating.  While in school I was able to keep up the tentative balance, but was never quite happy with my health regime.  Regardless, I was worried that I would be able to break old unhealthy patterns, hmm dessert you say?, and that I wouldn't be able to afford to have healthy meals.

May not look like much, but stuffed eggplants!

So I started to learn how to cook and the beauty that is moderation.  In the U.S. the food was a little more difficult because fresh fruit and vegetables can be so expensive, but here in Spain fresh produce is my cheapest purchase.  I've taken my health into my own hands by constantly searching for new healthy ways to cook the food I love.  I've also started to tap into Spanish foods with my Christmas gift of a Spanish cook-book which is full of vegtables and fruits.  Overall the most important thing I've learned is that while we eat to fuel our bodies, we also eat to enjoy.  Between using fresh ingredients, cooking from scratch, and moderation I have stayed healthy and happy post-college.  Not to mention staying active is now as easy as searching fitness on pinterest!

I thought my university would always be home

I was not the stereotypical college student, I spent more time with my friends off campus than on, but it still felt like home to me.  And with friends still left behind, I thought that feeling would never change for me.  Especially since my campus was fifteen minutes away from and I practically grew up on the campus.  Instead, I found that from the moment I stepped back on campus that it wasn't home anymore.  

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I was working six days a week and while I was worried about bills and going to bed on time, my friends were talking about parties and their classes.  I found that except for a few close friends, I couldn't relate to the people I had once hung out with anymore, or the goals that had for their lives at that moment.  Everytime I returned to campus I just felt more and more like an outsider looking in and one night when I walked past my old dorm, and saw a light on in my old room, it became clear that I no longer belonged there.  And wouldn't again.  At first I was sad, but it gave me the push I needed to move out of my comfort levels.  My old college may no longer be my home, but that didn't mean I had to lose my friends or the memories I would take with me.

I didn't think I could afford my loans

Oh student loans, why must you be so expensive?  They're were one of the most daunting things about graduating.  I just remember thinking helpless, how would I ever be able to pay them back?  But then again, I'm a proactive person and spent my senior year working two jobs on top of my studies to save money.  When my grace period was over I had already saved enough money to make the payments of my first year of loans.  And last year I saved up enough money to make the payments for two more years.

Mini-Plaza Mayor at Parque Europa

Don't get me wrong, it was a lot more work then you may think, I had to sacrifice a lot of time and things that I wanted. But thanks to that work I have been able to travel and make it to Spain this year (and afford my loans).  Yes, student loans are expensive, and a nuisance, and...you get the picture.  But they don't have to be impossible.  With planning and hard work, you can beat your loan payments and enjoy your life.  If you need some help making sense of your loans, read my post about dealing with student loan debt.

I thought I would be near my friends

This has been one of the hardest pills to swallow about going to a college near my house, and moving abroad to Spain (both with my friends from high school and college).  My friends are some of the most important people in my life and I thought I would be able to keep up our girl's nights and general adventures.  Post-college and having moved away I feel like I have to start all over again.  I feel like I'm back in high school, or a freshman in college trying to find new people I can connect with (particularly hard if you're introvert that does a poor awkward job at pretending to be an extrovert).

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But the hards thing has been that being so far away means I have missed a lot, of both the good and the bad.  I can't be there to congratulate my friends on the new job or comfort them when a loved one has passed away.  Even with skype, facebook, email, and whatsapp I'm not a part of their lives like we used to be.  I feel like I'm in a long distance relationship all over again, but this time with my friends.  While it's not easy, I've learned that the friendships (like all types of relationships) will remain strong if all parties want it to work and the effort is made to stay in touch.  Thanks technology!

I didn't think I could travel

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think that post-college I would be able to travel, let alone live abroad.  Believe me when I say it hasn't always been an easy path, but for me it has been worth all that I've had to given up.  And when I say give up, I mean all those little things that we have been told we need to be able survive: the newest clothes, the latest technology, a big house, new car, etc.  And if those things make you happy, there's nothing wrong with that.  I know plently of people who look at what I'm doing with my life and wouldn't feel happy or fulfilled.

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But if you're like me, and traveling is your dream, then anything is possible.  Maybe I don't have the nicest phone or laptop, maybe I don't have designer clothes or expensive accessories, I have a great experience and great memories.  I can say "Remember that time we rented an apartment in the center of Paris and could see the eiffel tower from our balcony?" or "Remember that time I celebrated my birthday in Pamplona at the Running of the Bulls?" or even "Remember that time I fell up a crowded metro escalator with all my luggage trying to make a plane to Sevilla on time?" (true story, complete wipe out).  And those memories, even the embarrassing, are for me worth giving up all those little things.

How has the post-college life met your expectations?

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